tuckergurl

No Ordinary Love?

My friend gave me two magazines the other day. She said I would need one after reading the other. I now understand why.

Let's begin with my bias. P. Diddy gets on my nerves. Yes, he is a smart business man but he is easily the biggest narcassist I have ever seen. This is the guy who has two video diarists on payroll. I don't think he's talented and he generally grates on my nerves. Sure, I am glad that a brother is makin money but I wish I did not have to deal with him so much.

Diddy and his ... significant other, Kim Porter, are on the cover of Essence. The article is called "No Ordinary Love". There is a four page spread with some beautiful photos of them. They are presented as a relationship to admire. Here is the abbreviated version of their relationship. Diddy got Porter pregnant and then right after she had the baby cheated on her with J. Lo because J. Lo had the same "energy" he did. He continuted to talk to Porter throughout his relationship with J. Lo. Eventually, J. Lo and Diddy broke up (rather J. Lo dumped him after the whole shoot out thing at the club) and now Diddy is in the most monogamous relationship he has ever been in. But he is not ready for marriage even though she is pregnant with his twins. She says she does not care about marriage anyway. (OK, I just don't believe that. There are people out there who do not believe in marriage but this gal is not one of them.)

The details of their relationship honestly are not my business. They can make it my business by talking about them in Essence but whatever Porter puts up with is her own thing. My issue is the fact that Essence is sending this message that this is a relationship to aspire to. That is sort of troubling. Should women aspire to this relationship because Diddy is so successful? Is it the whole "being with a successful man requires sacrifices that usually consist of letting him cheat on you" routine? What the heck am I supposed to think?

This may make me seem like a 40 year old woman but I have been completely enjoying the other magazine that my friend gave me, O. This month she talks to Shonda Rhimes. Give me the cheesy inspiration articles any day.

So Strange

Today, I was just goggling Bebe Moore Campbell. I was thinking that I was going to try to contact her when I visited LA to talk to her about her latest book, 72 Hour Hold, which features a family dealing with bipolar disorder. Then I find out that she passed away tonight at 56 of brain cancer. This has not been a good end of '06 for black folk.

Quotable Quotes

This was a much needed four days of leisure. I saw some movies (For Your Consideration which as H-Y-S-T-E-R-I-C-A-L and The Queen which was pretty good, mainly interesting in a Masterpiece Theater way which is not entirely bad but not 100% good and Thank You For Smoking On Demand which was mediocre to me), slept, did laundry, watched waay too much television, did a little clothes shopping (after walking out of a very picked through Victoria's Secret and Old Navy) and most importantly had a yummy Thanksgiving Dinner with the cutest baby ever!

The holidays are a bit of an uphill battle for me. I made it through which is the most important thing. Today I bought some smelly lotions and face stuff. I was feeling in need of some girly stuff. For the next few days I think I am in a girly phase, eye makeup and all.

I must finish this brief post with two quotable quotes from gal friends of mine. I could not resist:

"I am a generally optimistic person, but that holiday just blows." (When beginning talks of what to do on New Year's Eve)

"Why can't they just sleep with inappropriate people like I do when I get drunk? I only hurt myself." (After having the 10th long conversation about the most recent crazy drunken racist rants from Michael Richards and Mel Gibson)

A Bout of Insomnia

For those of you who are not fortunate enough to be up at 4am randomly on a weekday, I want you all to know that this is when MTV and VH-1 actually play videos. Yes, you've heard it here first. And they play new and old videos together. I just finished watching John Mayer's "Your Body Is Wonderland" and I forgot just how cute and humble he used to be. They then played The Beastie Boys' "Intergalactic" which is one of the few songs of theirs that I like. (I'm not so into them though I always feel like I should be.)

Right when I got intrigued, they played the new video by Vanessa Hudgens. She is the very cute, Latina girl from High School Musical (which I have seen and it made me feel very, very old). It's not that her song was horrible. It was just the first in a string of videos that were made not necessarily because the artist is super talented but more because they are young and cute and popular.

Then they played Akon's "Smack That" and I began to wonder: When did Eric Roberts become the go to guy for hip-hop videos? Is he pleased that his career gone in this direction?

Yes at this point I should go to bed but it's not happening. I thought having to form these thoughts would help but no such luck.

What took you so long?

What exec greenlit this OJ Simpson's book/interview/hypothetical account oh how he might have murdered his wife? What took them so long to figure out that this is an insanely offensive and gross endeavor? Sure, they saw the light"but this is ridiculous.

I have nothing new or meaningful to say about this. I simply am in shock that it happened in the first place.

An Article I Wrote

This article has been a while in the making. I have always been really curious about how people make documentaries in war zones. (Maybe because I don't think I can do it.) One thing I love about writing articles is the fact that I can meet new people and learn new things. This is our first podcast so be gentle. We decided to just include some interesting clips from my interview with Laura Poitras who directed My Country, My Country.

Filmmakers are weird.

I have been trying to apply for more "young and up and coming filmmaker" grants. I see people I know winning them all the time and I want to too. The scary part about being more proactive is that there is a bigger possibility for rejection but it is something that you have to push past I suppose.

Whenever I got to these seminars or mixers or whatever, I always see just how weird filmmakers are. I mean, I guess I'm weird too. Some are so socially awkward. Some are so self absorbed. Some have really short attention spans. Some have really low self esteem. I never feel really comfortable at these things. There is a part of me that thinks I'm not weird enough to really be an artist. Who knows?

I am really addicted to The Four Eyed Monsters podcasts and I thought I would share the trailer for the film coming out in NY on Dec. 1st. The filmmakers are so incredibly creative and I love being a part of their creative process. Happy Wednesday!

Blogging is like exercise.

You miss a week and your body starts to forget it ever did it.

Another week and your getting a little flabby.

A week after that and you stop being someone who exercises. You start making plans in the evenings and the people who are in dance or spin classes with you start to think that you've stopped taking the class.

So I'm at week three with blogging and week two with exercise. Both enrich me so I've gotta be better.

Some events during my blogging lapse:

* My best friend had her baby!!! He is a little cutie and everyone is happy and healthy. He is so tiny.
* Now that she is doing well (as well as a new Mom can be), I can now say that I was really anxious about her having the baby. I have a serious, serious fear of hosptials. I did not know it was so bad until the week before she gave birth. The last two times people I loved went to a hospital they did not return. I intellectually knew that my friend was going to be fine but emotionally, not so much. I was having some serious anxiety and not sleeping. I wanted to be a good friend and help her through this difficult and scary process but I had my own issus around it. I didn't hear from her for a few days and I started freaking out. But what I am proud of is the fact that I figured out what was going on with me and acknowledged it instead of acting like it wasn't going on. I was able to even talk to my friend about it and she sort of knew that I was feeling that way and was really amazing about wanting me to be a big part of the process so that I could feel more at ease. It really helped and I think it brought us even closer.
* Britney dumped Kevin Federline! This made me so so happy and I have no idea why. The Artist Formerly Known As Mr. Spears is the worst performer EVER!!! He needs to go away. NOW!!!
* At work, we finished a film that we hope gets into a big festival. Keep your fingers crossed.
* Reese and Ryan split up too. That one is sad. I don't think Ryan can act but I heart Reese and wish her well.
* I am working on a script and it's going pretty well. I think I finally understand that I need some structure in order to write. A treatment is my friend!
* The Democrats rule and Rumsfeld quit. I woke up having so much hope!
* But it was really, really warm that morning as it has been for a few days which would be great if it did not remind me that global warming is upon us.
* I went to a new media conference in Boston that was great. It turned out to be a great networking opportunity which I did not anticipate. There is still a lot to figure out when talking about video on the internet but I do want to be a part of that discussion.
* Ed Bradley and Gerald Levert died! What a week! So incredibly sad. Both were fairly young.
* Lindsey Lohan got into yet another car accident. Someone revoke her license please. She must be stopped.
* I saw a sneak preview screening of the new Anthony Minghella flick, Breaking and Entering with Jude Law and Robin Wright Penn. I enjoyed it but it's not a perfect film. My gal, Vera Farmiga does it again. She's hysterical! I have strange feelings about Jude. I think he can act but there's something about him. You just can't get in there with him. Maybe he's too pretty. I'm not sure. The nanny thing does not help.