tuckergurl

My Day of Testosterone

Let me begin by saying that I have a hard time saying that word, testosterone. All of my diction training in high school falls apart when I have to say that word. Why is that? Oh, my LP would have a field day with that one.

It all began at 11:15am when Barnes and Noble.com emailed me saying that the reading Barack Obama was doing was being moved from 7pm, as originally advertised, to noon. I immediately freaked out. I had planned to leave work early to get a seat. Noon was only 45 minutes away and it was in the middle of the day! Luckily I work at a cool place so the minute I read this email out loud, my co-workers screamed, "Run, run, run!" So off I went!

I have not written about my love for Barack in a long time so some new readers may not know about it. I was actually becoming disgruntled there for a while. I had discovered him fairly early on. (Though I will bow down to the Illinois citizens who really knew his greatness before most of us.) So when the Democratic National Convention happened and he became a HUGE star, I felt a bit like the secret was out. It's silly but I was never good at sharing. Obviously I had to get over it, especially if I want him to be President!

When he first got elected to Senate, he was kind of wishy washy. I can tell he is the kind of guy that really needs to be liked and a lot of his political career is going to be grappling with that issue. In interviews he would tell people not to talk badly about the President even though it was clear that he disagreed with what he was doing. He finally got over this and now is open about his desire to pull out of Iraq amongst other things. I was glad when this shift happened. I do not keep very many people on pedestals so losing him would have been hard.

But back to the reading. I knew I would not get a book signed and I was right. There were about hundred or so people who came early to get wrist bands for an autographed copy of his book. I want to reiterate this point to you all. Wrist bands ladies and gentlement! This was like a rock concert! Thankfully, I was at least able to get in and hear him speak.

It was a little tough to not get my book signed. Mainly because that thing would have been worth a lot of money! But also because there were all of these people ahead of me who had never even heard of him until he was Oprah the day before! You are so not worthy of a signed copy of his book. So not worthy.

Anyway, he came on stage and people were screaming! It was kind of crazy. He apologized profusely for not being able to sign everyone's books. He called New York his first love that he did not marry. (He went to Columbia and lived here for 5 years.) He talked about the title of his new book, The Audactiy of Hope. I wish I could give you a blow by blow but it really comes to my mind in pieces. I can't really remember because I was kind of stunned to be in the same room with him. I just admire him so much.

Later that day, I had another rush of testosterone when I saw The Departed. I really liked this movie. It was a lot of fun and had a lot of intense male energy. And so many good performances! Leonardo DiCaprio is not really my thing usually but he was fantastic and most importantly, pretty yummy looking in this movie. I now understand why Giselle can not walk away from this guy! Alec Baldwin and Mark Wahlberg are hysterical in the film also. Matt Damon was great though I would have liked to understand his character a bit more.

I love Scorsese for what he is. He is not a subtle filmmaker in any way. If he wants you to know what's written on an envelope, he will show you the envelope a hundred times to make sure you did not miss it. There will be a whole scene around this envelope to confirm that the slow group did not nod off and miss it. His movies are long and gory. His female characters are lame. But when he's on, he's on. I think he might have peaked with Goodfellas but The Departed is his best movie in a long, long time. I have not seen a Hollywood film that I was that entertained by in a long time!

So that was my day of testosterone. I feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

My Black Card Could Be Revoked!!!

Stop making it hard for me. You put the 2006 Black Movie Awards opposite the Season Finale of Project Runway. How can you do that to me???!!! I mean, I don't even understand what the Black Movie Awards are. Don't we already have the NAACP Awards? I mean I guess these awards are just for movies but you guys really need to do some PR around this because I did not even know it was happening until tonight.

My card was already in jeopardy by not telling my small blog audience to watch Eyes on the Prize on PBS. I kept forgetting and I really should have shouted it from the rooftops that this historic series was coming back after years of being in a copyright pergatory. Now it's done (but you can still buy it). I was taught history from this series. Many teachers just pressed play and had a cigarette in the hall while I developed my crush on Huey P. Newton. Oh, hopefully some of you watched it.

So here I am watching Project Runway because I have to know who wins this thing ... UPDATE: The winner is Jeffrey and I am fine with that. I liked his model also so it was a win, win. I loved Uli's line more and Michael was my favorite person but his line was weak. Laura has been eh to me all along. She definately brought the drama so I thank her for that.

Now I am trying to make things up by watching the last half hour. Some general thoughts:
* I can see that ATL was a big movie this year. I had no real desire to see it but it keeps getting mentioned.
* It is hard to see Ruby Dee getting older.
* I did not see When The Levees Broke. I don't have HBO and truthfully I am not ready. I know myself and I know what I can handle and I don't think I can handle it yet. I admire Spike Lee highly though and know that it is amazing. When he puts his mind to something and when he is coming from a good place, he can be brilliant (See Do The Right Thing or Malcolm X). Don't get me started about when he's not coming froma good place ...
* OK TNT, enough already with your commercials for the NBA's upcoming season.
* OK HBO, enough already with the commercial where you essentially pat yourself on the back for having so many shows with black people.
* This show has been cut up and cut up some more.
* I was moved by Laurence Fishburne's speech.
* And finally, I thought Tsotsi was really moving but ... kind of boring. Yeah ... my black card is gone.

Just a random thought to share

I know I wrote an entry not long where I said I liked Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. Yeah, scratch that.

Shonda Rhimes' World!

God bless Shonda Rhimes, creator of Grey's Anatomy, for creating an alternate universe where things that would never happen in the real world, happen in this one. I'm not being snarky. I'm just being honest. Here are a few examples:

* A black man is the king of this world (or the Chief of Surgery) and when he has an affair with the biggest female surgeon out there (Meredith Grey's mother), he leaves her to stay with his black wife. When Dr. Grey can not have the king of this world, she loses her mind and even in her darkest moment, when she can not even remember her daughter's name, she reminisces about the times she had with the king of the world.

* McSteamy (the hot new guy on the show) gets with a big boned woman (or big boned for television anyway), Callie, instead of some plain jane chick. He also sells his major plastic surgery practice in New York (which must have made oodles of money) to work at a hospital in Seattle after a transcontinental bootie call from a woman he sort of dated a while back and who has said she does not want him there many, many times.

* A doctor can get engaged to a patient, essentially kill him and not only get his father to forgive her but inherit over eight million dollars!!! But she is such a kind soul that she does not even notice the check in the envelope that her fiance's father gives to her. She instead listens to a beautifully written message from her fiance before he dies.

* And don't even get me started on the cases ...

Well, I guess this is Shonda's world and we just live in it. So be it. I still have a warm spot for Grey's but it had to be said. (A shout out to L. Britt who sparked the convo and came up with some good bits for this post.)

Thoughts On The Closer

First of all, thanks everyone for their input. I appreciate it. It got me thinking.

I'm not sure what I think about closing as a concept. It pushed me into action which I think was what I needed more than anything. My friend was right about one thing: I don't try very hard when it comes to the opposite sex.

Having a crush and going to see him every once in a while makes me feel like I am in the game. It makes me feel more attractive and I think that guys are more attracted to me. So I am just trying to stay in the game.

I did go see the crush on Saturday and we had a nice, stressfree convo. I am trying to get to know the crush and deciding if I even want to pursue him. I'll let you guys know what happens.

Again, thanks for the feedback. I have tons to think about.

Shortbus

Sometimes you see a movie and you really want to like it. You really do. Everytime you laugh during the film, you laugh a little too hard. You are really forgiving. You want to be having a really good time while you watch this film. But you know in your heart that you really only think this movie is OK. It's not quite as fun as you want it to be. It's not quite as insightful as you want it to be. It's just eh.

That's Shortbus.

Some folks say that Shortbus is a porn (because the actors are actually having sex in the film) but I disagree. Porn is all about the enjoyment of sex. Everyone loves what they're doing in porn flicks. They love what's being done to them. It's a big lovefest!! (Even if the women are underage or the men are kind of disgusting. Yes, I've see porn btw. It's not that big a deal.) Shortbus is about people who are not enjoying sex and the journey they go on to figure out why they are not enjoying sex or not getting as intimate as they want to be during sex. (Their lack of enjoyment of sex is all the more difficult because they are going to the coolest party/orgy in the world where everyone is enjoying themselves.)

The film makes you think and is fun in many ways but it is not quite as good as I wanted it to be. Oh well. It got me talking to folks about sex in an interesting and provocative way so I guess that's worth something.

Monica is BACK ...

... AND I'm not sure how I feel about it. She looks so Mary J. I do like the song but was she always so skinny?

The Closer

Over dinner the other day my friend presented a theory as to why we were both single. She said, "We're not closers. Other women are closers but not us."

This came after a conversation about a guy I had a crush on. He worked at a bar and for a brief spell I was stopping by to chat with him. OK, it was not a brief spell exactly. It was two times. The last time I stopped by I offered my number to get the name of his tattoo artist because I had finally figured out what tattoo I wanted and was looking for suggestions for someone to do it. (By the way, if you have any in the NY area, let me know!) I never heard from him and to me, that was that. I had tried my best.

I told my friend this and she looked at me strangely. Her face said, "That's it!" I immediately thought that she would be on my side. She is a tough, no nonsense girl. Insead she asked, "How many men have you been into lately?" Not many actually. "I'm just sayin. Try a little harder."

There is this speech that Alec Baldwin has in David Mamet's Glengarry Glen Ross where he talks to a bunch of guys in his real estate office essentially about why they suck. Their problem is that they don't know how to close. Here's a little excerpt:

Blake: Go and do likewise, gents. The money's out there, you pick it up, it's yours. You don't--I have no sympathy for you. You wanna go out on those sits tonight and close, close, it's yours. If not you're going to be shining my shoes. Bunch of losers sitting around in a bar. (in a mocking weak voice) "Oh yeah, I used to be a salesman, it's a tough racket." (he takes out large stack of red index cards tied together with string from his briefcase) These are the new leads. These are the Glengarry leads. And to you, they're gold. And you don't get them. Because to give them to you is just throwing them away. (he hands the stack to Williamson) They're for closers. I'd wish you good luck but you wouldn't know what to do with it if you got it.

This monologue does not simply apply to real estate but to dating as well. Some women can close. They can meet the guy and something happens, quickly. And when I say something I don't mean a hookup. I mean they actually begin dating this person. I used to be a closer and somehow I have lost it. I meet someone interesting but nothing really happens. I'm not saying it's completely my fault but I am saying that this ability that other people have to "close" has been lost on me lately.

My friend wanted me to open this up to the blog community and so I am. What makes a closer? I want to know.

A Funny Article

Check out this cute tale my friend wrote in The New York Times Magazine. I remember him telling me this story.

Things I Am Recommending

GBV
Originally uploaded by Lady Macabea.

In case your are looking for some things to consume, here are my suggestions:

1. Jamie Lidell - Adriana got free tix to see him at Wired's Next Wave Festival and luckily I tagged along. I had downloaded a song of his from iTunes but had no idea what a great live performer he was. Not only is his voice incredibly soulful but he mixes his own music onstage as he is performing. He also had a great sequined jacket on.

2. The Science of Sleep - So cute. So so cute.

3. A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints - I am sort of recommending this. There are some amazing things about it but it is uneven overall. I think it's worth it though and want to read the book next.

4. Brothers and Sisters - I really liked this show although I can not deal with Calista Flockhart at all! Here's hoping it can live up to its pilot.

5. The free iTunes download - I have said it before. I have been exposed to so many bands before they go huge. Some examples, The Fray, Corinne Baily Rae and Jamie Lidell.