As You Are

I was going to post a photo of a market in Lagos but it took too long to load.  Close your eyes and imagine a big, crowded space with vendors and buses and you have it.  I forget the name of the market.  I am getting bad about knowing the names of places I have been to here in Nigeria.  Seke and his family have been taking me around and when you have guides, you just get go where they tell you to.  When I travel, I tend to be like that.  I like to be led.  (It is only when I travel though.)

When I first got to Lagos I thought it was kind of insane.  This is a big statement from a New Yorker.  Honestly, the beauty was lost on me.  I had just been to two really beautiful places, Cape Town, South Africa & Kigali, Rwanda.  Both cities have beautiful mountains and hills.  Lots of green while being real cities.  (Though Cape Town is a much, much, much bigger city than Kigali.)  Lagos is not beautiful in that way.  It is big and dirty and kind of chaotic.

Then a few days in I had this thought that has not just applied to my perception of Lagos but to my interactions with people as well:

Why don't I just appreciate this place for what it is and not think about what it's not?  Why don't I stop trying to make it into what I want it to be and like what it is? 

This concept has changed a lot for me.  I now have warmed up to this crazy place.  There are a million and one things to do.  People are very hip here.  They dress so well I can barely keep up!  Buildings may not look so beautiful on the outside but when you get in them, they are these incredible, beautiful places.  I am not sure I could navigate this place if I did not come here to see someone who lives here.  I have been spoilt by this experience and I know it.

This idea has really helped me with my interactions with people.  I have stopped thinking things like Why can't you just ...? and just realized that not everyone has the reactions to things that I do or are in the same mood I am in all the time.  Maybe other people have this understood about people but I am still learning.

(Note:  I have been wanting to share more pictures but I have been having a hard time with both Typepad and Flickr while I've been away.  I'm not sure what is up because I have a fast internet connection but Flickr takes a million years.  I have begun to upload photos on Snapfish and that has been somewhat easier but photos are coming.) 

Comments

[Beebs]

Does this mean you will be all warm and fuzzy on us when you come back and give us stewart smalley affirmations??? =)

Just kidding. I love traveling for everything that you just wrote in this entry. What you just described is what EVERYONE forgets everyday. It is expecially true in regards to how we view ourselves- its so strange how little we take into consideration the effect of predetermined notions. But we do it. I imagine that Lagos is like a lot of cities (even my own fair willy b) all the treasures lie deep in the ruff underneath the chaos and dirt. Where are you off to next? Ghana or Senegal?